Missy and I are very close in age.
When we were young children, people often thought we were twins. (Was it the
matching scrunchies and jelly shoes?)
DIAGRAM 1: ARE WE TWINS??
Perhaps the jelly shoes and the scrunchies; and during the holidays our matching leggins, Christmas sweaters, scrunchies with tiny bells, and tube socks (Thank you Trisha! lol)
It did not take long for my parents to
realize to get us the exact same of everything. Why?
Because we fought over everything.
Even air. But in the end I ALWAYS GOT THE BETTER ONE. It did not matter which
one of us initially received what.
How was this possible? Well through
one of the following methods:
1. I was lucky enough to actually
get the better one.
2. Missy got the better one and I convinced Missy to switch with me through guilt or pity tactics
3. Missy got the better one and
refused to switch with me. Until… I convinced her mine was better and she would
then beg me to switch
4. Missy initially got better
one and I just decided I would like mine better until I believed it. Then
Missy would beg me to switch and I would refuse.
In the end, Missy always wanted the
one I wanted her to have and I got the one I wanted to have.
Poor missy. She never had a chance
because she would take pity on me but I was STRICTLY business.
One of the most infamous instances
was when I convinced her to switch a coveted stuffed animal cat (that
purred…hello? AWESOME!) with my useless fools gold I got on a field trip. Now,
I actually did like my fools gold. But I loved that cat. Missy even told me
recently that she KNEW, as we were in negotiations, that there was no actual
use for the fools gold. It was even called “FOOLS gold.” But for some reason
she switched with me. Perplexes us both to this day.
DIAGRAM 2: BEST CAT EVER OR FOOLS GOLD?
This stuffed animal cat was way more awesome than it looks here.
I adored it for YEARS. Poor Missy regretted it for YEARS!
I tell you all of this to set up
the following story:
One time we got these little
carousel horses. Missy had the purple haired purple one and I had the white
with yellow haired one. I did not want mine. I wanted Missy's.
A CHRONICLE OF MY ATTEMPT:
"Missy you are blonde so you
should have the blonde one."
She's kept playing with her perfect
purple horse
"No I really like this one
Sarah."
She kept smiling and playing.
Little bastard.
"Ok well I just thought you
would want this one since it is better and you say I am always getting the
better one."
I got her interest. Reluctantly she
asked:
"How is that one better? I
like mine"
This was my chance. Gotta do this
right.
"Well..."
I had nothing. I needed to think
fast.
"... You see the colors of the
roses in this horse’s hair? Isn't that one of your favorite colors? Plus there
is no such thing as purple horses, so you would have the more realistic one. No
one could say, your horse is so unrealistic. Trust me missy you are gonna
want this horse."
She was looking at me like I was
the devil trying to trick her.
"Sarah, you always trick me
and end up getting the better one. You always do. I switch or we switch twice
or you make yours look better and I always regret it. I still regret giving up
that cat. This time I'll just keep this one. I like it a lot. "
This appeal to me emotion should
have made me feel guilty. I should have said ok fine Missy, you should have at
least ONE thing you prefer over mine. But I just could not.
After another 10 minutes of attempting to convince her she would not budge. I was in unfamiliar territory.
"Ok that's fair. So, I noticed
your horses tail is kinda
long. Do you want me to trim it? I'm gonna trim
my horses tail as well. "
My plan was this: to trim the tail too short so that Missy would no longer want hers and switch with me. Obviously, it was no longer about actually having the better horse. It was about getting Missy to switch with me. It was purely principalities that kept me going.
I do not recall how I convinced Missy,
or if I just went behind her back. But I sure enough trimmed the hell outta
that horse's tail. In fact as soon as I did it I regretted it immediately. Then
I didn't want it anymore. My plan went too perfectly. Missy was horrified at
my actions and the state of her purple horse. She MADE me switch.
The moment the hair fell onto
the ground I felt guilty about trying to trick missy annnd knowing that I was
now stuck with it. Now I had a purple horse with a tail that made the horse
look electrocuted. Stupid purple horse.
DIAGRAM 3: I DID THIS TO MYSELF
What the hell was I thinking?
We never played with them again.
Surprisingly, that was the only
time that my plans backfired on me. But I deserved it
MORAL:
Don't be so caught up in
getting your way that you loose sight of the real goal
Or
Don't Ty to trick your little
sister outta her stuff
Or
You cant always get your way
